Welcome back to Mental Health Monday! Right now I’m in the middle of a series on healthy trust and safety. Here’s what I’ve talked about so far: Losing Our Safety and Characteristics of Unsafe People {Part 1}{Part 2}{Part 3}, and {Part 4}. So far we’ve discussed the huge warning flags to look for to identify unsafe people, but what about the safe people? That’s where we’re at today!

safe people characteristics

Safe People…

  • Own their Reactions
  • Forgive us instead of holding on to the past
  • are consistent and stable
  • have follow through and keep their promises
  • keep confidences and secrets that people have entrusted to them.
  • are connected to others & have the ability to trust
  • are consistently growing and becoming safer and healthier
  • encourage freedom in those around them
  • deal with their problems and hurts, even when it’s scary
  • are ok with earning the trust of those around them
  • can admit that they have faults and weaknesses
  • are open to feedback and healthy criticism
  • are truth tellers & value honesty
  • are humble
  • change their behaviors instead of just saying “I’m sorry”
  • don’t play the victim
  • are open to confrontation, and do it in healthy ways
  • respect, encourage, and implement healthy boundaries
  • are not enmeshed or codependent
  • can give grace to themselves and others around them
  • work to decrease the cognitive distortions in their life (like all or nothing thinking, for example)
  • Know their limits and enforce them
  • love themselves and others appropriately and well

This isn’t an exhaustive list, of course, but is a list to start you thinking. Plus, if you can find someone who is actively seeking after these things in their life, they’ll be pretty safe for you.

Now it’s your turn to share! What other characteristics would you include in this list? Who’s an example of a safe person in your life? What makes them safe?